Star Force Gemini Chapter 5.1

“We have 12 of these shotgun shells, 26 of these pussy 9-mils, and 16 of those .357 magnums.” [Jestro] says as they put all his ammo on the kitchen counter at C4121205’s house.
“Damn, dude. Do you think we’ll have enough?” 김재민 asks drinking a green apple slush, no boba.
“I haven’t calculated all of the variables yet.” [Jestro] says as he pulls his laptop out of his backpack.
“Yo, [Jestro] stop being a fucking bitch and start calculating that shit.” Ω says as he pulls a package of bagel bites out of C4121205’s freezer. [Jestro] does so.
“Okay, guys.” C4121205 says to the three of them. “What the hell happened? One minute I’m just chilling here by myself jackin…working out, and the next thing I know, you guys are banging on my door.”
“Okay, this is what happened.” 김재민 walks over to C4121205. “I was at work when this girl came in. She was gorgeous, she had huge child bearing hips!”
“Like Trace Face™?” C4121205 asks.
“Better.” Ω says.
“Yeah, dude.” [Jestro] says. “It was like babies would fall out at any given time.”
“Damn.” Said C4121205.
“I know.” 김재민 continues. “So she comes in and she recognizes me, like recognizes me. The real me, 김재민. So she comes up and puts her yogurt on the scale, like normal, you know, she’s just a normal girl, I think. I’m thinking this to myself, I’m thinking, ‘she’s pretty cute’, but then when I say the automated ‘Hello, did you find everything alright?’ line, you know, that one people always say. She looks me dead in the eye and says, ‘Yes, 김재민 I did.’. And that’s when I nearly shit myself, like I’m about to crap in my boxer briefs, like we’re talking massive, huge, runny, mud butt, kinda diarrhea like shit, the kind that trails down your legs and ends up staining your socks, you know?” The three others are completely enveloped by 김재민’s story. “So I’m about to shit myself and that’s when my manager walks up next to me, to check up on me or something?”
“The hot one?” [Jestro] asks.
“Yeah.”
“The one you wanna fuck?” Ω asks.
“Yep.”
“The guy? Or the girl?” C4121205 asks, they all look at him.
“…Uh…I’m not even going to acknowledge that stupid question.” 김재민 says. “So anyways, she comes up and puts her hand on my shoulder and says, ‘Hey, are you friends with Ben here?’ To the girl, she says this to the girl, the one that recognizes me, recognizes me as the real me, the 김재민 me.”
“Dude,” Ω says to [Jestro]. “You know he totally got a huge woody when she touched his shoulder.
“Yeah.” [Jestro] says.
“And that’s when the girl, the hot girl, with the big hips says, ‘Yeah, well, kind of, not really. We go to school together. My name’s Dolinda.’ Then she puts her hand out and my manager, JooEun, takes her hand off my shoulder and shakes Dolinda’s hand.”
“Dude, blue balls.” [Jestro] says to Ω, who, in turn says.
“Bet he jerked off after work.”
“Oh, yeah, he definitely did.”
“So they’re shaking hands, right? Just shaking hands, you know, up and down…up and down. And that’s the moment that I notice the tattoo on Dolinda’s wrist.” 김재민 looks at all of them. “A 23.”
‘Fuck!” [Jestro] screams, Ω faints.
“Shit, dude! What the hell does a 23 mean?” C4121205 asks as he runs to aid the already recovered Ω.
“Look.” 김재민 says as he shows his right wrist, there too is a 23 tattoo. “Show him guys.” [Jestro] and Ω show C4121205 their right wrists, 23s all around.
“What does it mean?” C4121205 asks. “She’s a badass assassin too?”
“Maybe.” Ω says as he gets to his feet and opens the microwave. “Or it could mean she’s our competition.”
“What do you mean?” C4121205 asks.
“Every one of us, in The Guild, gets a piece.” 김재민 says.
“Yeah, every kill has a price tag, and every agent gets a fraction of the price.” [Jestro] says.
“Why do you think the assassins are so rich, its because we’re always getting paid.” Ω says.
“I thought it was because killing people was illegal and highly dangerous?” C4121205 asks.
“Well, male frontal nudity is illegal and highly dangerous, but people don’t get paid shit loads for doing it!.” Ω screams and throws the plate of bagel bites into the wall next to him.
“Well, that’s not entirely true, Ω.” [Jestro] says. “It all depends on location.”
“Don’t judge me, criminal!” Ω says as tears form in his eyes.
“Okay, what the hell?” C4121205 asks. “Why do you guys get paid so much?”
“Its because we all get a share of the killings.” 김재민 says. “Usually its really small, because there are so many of us in The Guild. I mean, there’s like a shit load, like a huge amount, we’re talking triple digits, MAYBE!! So if you were an assassin; and you wanted a shit load of cash, a lot of fucking money, huge amounts of chedda’, wouldn’t you hunt out the other Guild members?”
“Yeah, good point. I probably would.” C4121205 says. “But why, then, haven’t you guys killed each other?” He motions to all three of them, who look at one another.
“Never had the reason to.”
“Never got around to it.”
“Never had the time.”
“Oh, okay.” C4121205 says. He thinks to himself. “I’m still confused about the guy who knew Ω was agent 23, if you all have 23s on your right wrists then shouldn’t you all be agent 23?”
“No, bitch.” Ω rises to his feet and thrusts out his left wrist with another 23 tattooed on it. “23 motherfucker!” Then 김재민 shows his left wrist, 32.
“[Jestro] let’s see yours.” C4121205 says to him. [Jestro] walks up slowly, he seems shy, ashamed even. He lifts his left sleeve revealing 666 tattooed on his wrist. “Wait, why is your number so big? What do those numbers mean?”
“Boy, let me school you on a few things; first of all, the more you know, the faster you’ll die, second, the numbers mean what number you are, like I was the 23rd assassin to join The Guild.” He looks at all of them. “Yeah, I’ve been in it for a while. And last; you’re fuckin’ C4121205!”
“Thanks, dick.” C4121205 says with a laugh. Then he turns to [Jestro]. “So why did you join so late?”
“Well, in all honesty, these two are real assassins, with real skillz. I just made the robo-suit, I calculate and map out what it capable of doing. Have you ever seen me after a fight? I’m completely wiped out, my body can’t do the things the suit can. I’m a made assassin, not a real one, like these two.” [Jestro] says.
“Bullshit, dude!” 김재민 says. “Iron Man made his suit, he’s still a superhero. Its not the size of you Hulk, it’s the motion of your Yoda!”
“I guess.” [Jestro] says and goes back to his calculations.
“So anyways, was there more to the story 김재민?” C4121205 asks.
“Oh, yeah. Tons more!” 김재민 says and sits down on the counter in front of C4121205. “So, where was I? Ah, yes! They’re shaking hands and I see the 23 tattoo and that’s when I freak the fuck out and gotta go, I tell JoonEun I gotta roll out, and she’s all pissed but she’s a woman so I don’t really care too much.”
“Okay?”
“So I’m leaving and that’s when I see Ω, he’s out in the parking lot talking to some Asian guys.” 김재민 says.
“Yeah, those guys wanted to race me.” Ω says walking up next to 김재민. “They wanted to race my RX7 in their shitty little Honda Civics, can you believe, the nerve of some people, I was insulted, thoroughly insulted.”
“Yeah!” 김재민 says. “So I walk out and I see him and he’s all like…”
“I asked him why the hell he looked so pale, and why he was sweating.” Ω says.
“That’s when I tell him, ‘Dude, we need to leave, RIGHT NOW!’ and then I opened the door to his RX7.”
“Yeah, but this fuck head forgot that the steering wheel of my car is on the right side, not the left.” Ω looks at [Jestro] who looks back. “Won that shit in Japan, son!”
“So anyways, I slide over and tell Ω we need to go.” 김재민 says. “So he gets in and that’s when Dolinda’s there, she stops right in front of his car and just looks at us.”
“Yeah, that little bitch!”
“You know, we obviously can’t just run her over so Ω revs his engine to try and scare her off, I guess.”
“I did, but it didn’t work.” Ω says with a saddened heart.
“No, it didn’t.” 김재민 agrees. “All it did was piss her off, and she pulled a beam katana out and pointed it at us and said, ‘Come out now 김재민 and Ω, I’m here for your heads.’ Dude, it sent a chill down my spine!”
“So what did you do?” C4121205 asks excited as a kid at X-mas.
“Well, I opened the car door and threw a knife at her, it hit her hip and then I said, ‘Oh, I'm sorry, did my knife get in the way of your ass? Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately or get out of my building like now!’ and then she looked at me and said she was outside, and that’s when I knew she hadn’t ever seen Zoolander.” 김재민 said.

-Sir Jestro