The Amazing Adventures of the Jizzenator: Chapter: 2

Head Like a Hole

This chapter is chapter 2 which means this was after chapter 1 so it will leave off where the first one ended you ho'bags.
"Why the fuck did you do that Jizzenator I could of gotten some pussay."Shouted Right-Hand Boy.
"You know it's disrespectful to talk like that about woman Right-Hand Boy." Yodeled Jizzenator.
"Oh,but it's not disrespectful to talk about how tight that police officers ass was." Said Right-Hand Boy.
"Well did you see it, it was tight.Yep,tight like a monkey's butthole." Said Jizzenator.
"And how the hell would you know how tight a monkeys butthole is." Inquired Right-Hand Boy.
"I have my ways Right-Hand Boy...I have my ways." Said Jizzenator. Just then a monkey ran across the street towards The Jizzenator and Right-Hand Boy, he stopped and waved at The Jizzenator. " Not now Mr. Tight Cheeks! I'm working, I'll call you later like I said I would." The monkey turns around hurt and runs away into the distance of the city.
After five minutes of uncomfortable silence The Jizzenator screamed out, " Testie Sense Tingeling!" Then The Jizzenator jumped into the street.
"...The hell are you doing?" Right-Hand Boy asked.
" I must save the day!" He screamed.
" What the hell's wrong? What do you need to save?" Right-Hand Boy asked.
" There are two cars speeding this way we must stop them!" The Jizzenator screamed.
" Why the fuck do you keep screaming? I'm right here. And you're the stupid asshole standing in the middle of the street! And what do you mean by 'we'?" Right-Hand Boy asked.
" What are you saying? You don't want there to be a 'we' anymore? I thought you were different than the rest, I didn't think you'd hurt me but I guess I was wrong! Go run back to your little whore Right-Hand Boy!" The Jizzenator said not paying attention to the road.
" Hey fuck you man! I should fucking ki-" Just then, even before Right-Hand Boy could finish his sentence about killing The Jizzenator, he, The Jizzenator, was hit by one of those speeding cars.
The Jizzenator hitched a ride on the windshield of the speeding car. Then he sped off into the night like a black winged angel. A scream rang into the ears of Right-Hand Boy.
" Elizabeth!" He screamed, and ran to where Ms. Cummings was.
When Right-Hand Boy got back to the liquor store, he saw The Ice Cream Man Driving off with his woman, Elizabeth Cummings.
" Stop your BLEEPING Ice Cream Truck van thingy or I'll BLEEPING BLEEP you in your BLEEPING BLEEPER you...fuckin' assbeloncer." Shouted Right-Hand Boy, but then realized he was acting like The Jizzenator, by not doing anything that is. He saw a 94' Civic. It was red and a Jesus Freak bumber sticker on it. He ran and slid across the hood of the car, then ran around back to the drivers door.
" That was pointless." He said. He got in the car, and drove after The Ice Cream Man and Ms. Cummings. Right-Hand Boy wondered why someone had left the keys in their car and kept the car running and had the radio on playing that song, It's Raining Men, by that band that's not important enough to remember. Then he saw that there were two teenagers in the back seat performing oral sex on one another.
" Oh! That's fuckin' gross!" Right-Hand Boy shouted.
" Who's that Tucker?" Asked one of the teenagers.
" I don't know Kyle, I thought he was a friend of yours coming to join the party." They both giggled. They then went back to performing oral sex on one another but were still giggling causing them to choke on each others chickens. They died. Right-Hand Boy then got out of the car and got another one that looked exactly the same as the other one but without the dead gay guys. He sped after The Ice Cream Man's Truck van thingy.
Right-Hand Boy put the pedal to the metal as they say, but the funny thing is, the car's speedometer went up to 120mph. but the car maxed out at 60mph.
" Move you piece of shit!" Right-Hand Boy yelled. He couldn't see where The Ice Cream Man's truck van thingy was, but was following the trail of children who were chasing it waving dollar bills in the air. " Why the fuck are kids out this late?" Right-Hand Boy thought to himself. As Right-Hand Boy drove the car as fast as it could go, which was 60 mph. he looked at his mirrors as all good drivers do. He saw something chasing him, it ran up next to the car on the passenger side, it was Stranger. Right-Hand Boy rolled down the window and said.
" Well, hey there Stranger!"
" Hey." Stranger replied.
" So did you ever find that Steef you were looking for?" Right-Hand Boy asked, glancing back at the road.
" I don't want to talk about it." Stranger said dropping his voice.
" Well, Stranger I'm kinda in the middle of something so yeah..." Right-Hand Boy said then he took a left turn at an intersection. He could now see The Ice Cream Man's truck van thingy and sped after it. He then heard a voice and it said.
" So you uh, you don't wanna talk anymore?" Stranger asked running beside the car again.
" Stranger I'm kinda in the middle of something here." Right-Hand Boy said.
" Yeah, well fuck you, I'm gonna go find Joe Mama." Stranger said. " Bitch." Then he ran off in another direction. Right-Hand Boy heard in the distance these little green lizard guys say to Stranger. " Hey, dude it's that guy who like has got like the face."
" Yeah, I think his name's Steve." Another said.
" Hey, there Steve dude!" The first said.
" No, his name's Stranger!" A talking Chicken said. " I think he might be gay 'cuz a' the way he runs and all."
" He's like a Stranger even to himself dude!" The second lizard guy said. Then Right-Hand Boy could hear no more.
He sped after the van thingy and got closer with every minute. all of a sudden Right-Hand Boy heard some suspenseful music going,"dun dun dun da da da dum dum dum... dum dum," out of nowhere Right-Hand Boy heard a black man say,"Ya'll ready for this." then he saw cheerleaders cheering on the sidewalk.
Right-Hand Boy then saw the Ice Cream Man's truck in a nightclub parking lot and drove in and parallel parked.
Right-Hand Boy then raced out of the car into the club...then raced back out and put a quarter in the meter and went back in.
Inside was The Torn Phoenixx playing their new hit single,'Game Over.'
" That singer needs to sing louder, their back up singer is louder than him." Right-Hand Boy thought to himself.
Then he turned to the person next to him and asked," Who's singing lead vocals."
"Huh? Oh, that's Tom." Said a TTP fan which are also known as Embers.
He then saw The Ice Cream Man run up a flight of spiral stairs to the V.I.P. room holding Elizabeth over his shoulder.
" That motherfucker!" Right-Hand Boy screamed as he ran to the other side of the club, which was where the V.I.P. room was located. He got to the other side of the club, but it took him forever because everyone in there was rocking to TTP's awesome music. When he reached the stairs, Right-Hand Boy sped up them, he needed to save his woman.
Once he got to the top of the stairs Right-Hand Boy was stopped by two huge, seven foot tall bouncers.
" Fuck." Right-Hand Boy said out loud. They looked down at him and asked where he thought he was going, only " V.I.P.'s are allowed inside."
" But am I a V.I.P.?" Asked The Jizzenator who looked like he got hit by a car, oh wait he did. " Because you told me last night Jeff that I was-" The bouncer on the left cut The Jizzenator off by saying.
" Oh, yes, yes, please come right in Mr., um."
" Right-Hand Boy." The Jizzenator said. Right-Hand Boy ran into the room while The Jizzenator flirted with Jeff and Jerry, they're brothers.
" Elizabeth!" Right-Hand Boy yelled.
" Right-Hand Boy!" She screamed running out of a curtain covered room. Half of her clothes were ripped off, but unfortunately for Right-Hand Boy none of her breasts were exposed. " It was horrible! He tried to have sex with me with some cookie dough ice cream!"
" It's okay Elizabeth. It's okay." Right-Hand Boy said comforting her with a hug, purely non-sexually.
" It'll only be okay when I have her and two scoops of lovin', with some chocolate syrup." The Ice Cream Man said. He was naked except for the man thong he wore.
" Oh! I'm fucking blind!" Right-Hand Boy screamed. " Put some fucking clothes on you fuckin' bastard!" The Ice Cream Man ran up to Right-Hand Boy and hit him in the face with an Ice Cream scooper. Right-Hand Boy fell to the ground.
The Ice Cream Man grabbed Elizabeth once again. Right-Hand Boy prayed to the gods to give him a chance to save her. His prayer was answered.
TTP began to play 'Secret Agent Man' their crowd pleaser. The lead guitar player's guitar had so much feedback it stunned The Ice Cream Man giving Right-Hand Boy a chance to finish the job. He took Elizabeth from him, and hit him with a furious right hook. The Ice Cream Man was out ice cream cold.
" My hero!" Elizabeth said.
" So does that mean I get a kiss?" Right-Hand Boy asked.
" That's not until the third date." Said Elizabeth.
" But I just fucking saved you from that perverted ice cream asshole and I'm still not getting even a kiss for a reward?" Right -Hand Boy asked.
" Nope." She replied.
" Why the hell not?" Right-Hand Boy asked.
" Because I'm playing hard to get." Said Elizabeth.( End Scene.)

-Bryan and Ryan