"Can you just close your eyes, let whatever happens happen, and just tell us what a typical day off is?" Sherri Lin asks.
I close my eyes, let me head drop. I hunch over in the seat.
"I don't usually get days off, the living always die."
"We understand that, Rod. But please, just try for us." Sherri insists.
I let out a sigh.
"Alright. Its like...maybe I'll be walking around downtown. They have old buildings there, antique shops, shit like that. In older places people still freak out about the rats, but its not as bad as if I were at like some upscale hotel or something." I squeeze my eyes closed harder. "Maybe I'd go into an old book store, the kinds that only sell donated books. A place that has that kind of...how do I describe it? Forgotten vibe, I guess. Like none of those important people ever come in here. It'd be like tucked away on some side street. It wouldn't even have a sign, or maybe some hand painted one with like moons on it or something."
I let out another sigh.
"Okay, so I'm in there. The place is lit by candles, and that gives it a warm orange color that bounces around. Its nice because it matches that old book smell. I like that smell, so does the raven. As I walk my feet press against the old raised floor boards and they creak under my weight making me sound massive. The only other sound is the old woman who owns the place, maybe she's muttering to herself and scribbling on paper. I'd try to walk around the far wall of the shop, hoping she wouldn't see the rats. But I know she'd be able to hear them scuttling across the floor boards after me. Maybe I'd pick a book up at random, I'd open it to a random page and pick a random paragraph to start reading."
The raven lets out a low croak that gurgles in his throat, I feel him adjust himself on my shoulder.
"If the raven approved of the book he'd ignore it, if he didn't he'd peck at one of the corners."
"And what happens if he doesn't approve?" Sherri asks.
"I'd check the price tag and just toss it on the floor for the rats to tear apart. Then I'd pay the old lady for it an apologize for the mess." I say.
"How do you think she would react?"
"She'd probably be expecting the raven to peck her eyes out, people tell me that they have that feeling a lot."
"What about if she saw the rats?"
I open my eyes.
"Well, what does everyone here think of them? They're not filthy, they're just cursed to be on the wrong side of some horrible PR."
"So you don't hate the rats?" Sherri sounds genuine.
"I used to, but they won't ever leave, so what can I really do about them?"
"I sure hope we can find an answer for that during our time here." Sherri looks around at the circle of chairs in the center of a community college gymnasium. "The same goes for all of you. That's what we're here to do, to help you with your paranormal issues."
Paranormal issues, huh? At least its a step up from a psychiatrist, even that pet one didn't have any luck.
"That's all the time we have for this week. We'll be meeting here again at the usual time. Thank you everyone and God bless."
This is how I spend Tuesday nights from 7:30-9:30pm. In a basketball court with a bunch of people who think they got abducted by aliens or are being followed by ghosts. They all look at me like I'm the freak because I'm the only one with an issue that the whole room can see. I'm being followed by thirty rats and a giant, cat sized raven who never leave me alone.
Oh, and this is also the place where I'll meet the mother of my children, that's actually not the weirdest part of this story.
-Sir Jestro
I close my eyes, let me head drop. I hunch over in the seat.
"I don't usually get days off, the living always die."
"We understand that, Rod. But please, just try for us." Sherri insists.
I let out a sigh.
"Alright. Its like...maybe I'll be walking around downtown. They have old buildings there, antique shops, shit like that. In older places people still freak out about the rats, but its not as bad as if I were at like some upscale hotel or something." I squeeze my eyes closed harder. "Maybe I'd go into an old book store, the kinds that only sell donated books. A place that has that kind of...how do I describe it? Forgotten vibe, I guess. Like none of those important people ever come in here. It'd be like tucked away on some side street. It wouldn't even have a sign, or maybe some hand painted one with like moons on it or something."
I let out another sigh.
"Okay, so I'm in there. The place is lit by candles, and that gives it a warm orange color that bounces around. Its nice because it matches that old book smell. I like that smell, so does the raven. As I walk my feet press against the old raised floor boards and they creak under my weight making me sound massive. The only other sound is the old woman who owns the place, maybe she's muttering to herself and scribbling on paper. I'd try to walk around the far wall of the shop, hoping she wouldn't see the rats. But I know she'd be able to hear them scuttling across the floor boards after me. Maybe I'd pick a book up at random, I'd open it to a random page and pick a random paragraph to start reading."
The raven lets out a low croak that gurgles in his throat, I feel him adjust himself on my shoulder.
"If the raven approved of the book he'd ignore it, if he didn't he'd peck at one of the corners."
"And what happens if he doesn't approve?" Sherri asks.
"I'd check the price tag and just toss it on the floor for the rats to tear apart. Then I'd pay the old lady for it an apologize for the mess." I say.
"How do you think she would react?"
"She'd probably be expecting the raven to peck her eyes out, people tell me that they have that feeling a lot."
"What about if she saw the rats?"
I open my eyes.
"Well, what does everyone here think of them? They're not filthy, they're just cursed to be on the wrong side of some horrible PR."
"So you don't hate the rats?" Sherri sounds genuine.
"I used to, but they won't ever leave, so what can I really do about them?"
"I sure hope we can find an answer for that during our time here." Sherri looks around at the circle of chairs in the center of a community college gymnasium. "The same goes for all of you. That's what we're here to do, to help you with your paranormal issues."
Paranormal issues, huh? At least its a step up from a psychiatrist, even that pet one didn't have any luck.
"That's all the time we have for this week. We'll be meeting here again at the usual time. Thank you everyone and God bless."
This is how I spend Tuesday nights from 7:30-9:30pm. In a basketball court with a bunch of people who think they got abducted by aliens or are being followed by ghosts. They all look at me like I'm the freak because I'm the only one with an issue that the whole room can see. I'm being followed by thirty rats and a giant, cat sized raven who never leave me alone.
Oh, and this is also the place where I'll meet the mother of my children, that's actually not the weirdest part of this story.
-Sir Jestro
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